


Atonement

by thegirloverseas



Category: La casa de papel | Money Heist (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Forgiveness, Palawan (La casa de papel), Reunion Fic, an attempt to fix 1x13, serquel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-09
Updated: 2020-02-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:01:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22633162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegirloverseas/pseuds/thegirloverseas
Summary: In Palawan, Raquel and Sergio are finally, blissfully, in paradise but for Sergio, remnants of the past are still clouding their happiness.
Relationships: Raquel Murillo/Professor | Sergio Marquina
Comments: 15
Kudos: 89





	Atonement

**Author's Note:**

> For this little piece, I want to thank Evendale for her emotional support and for discussing in detail nearly every aspect of this story with me multiple times, for offering me her insights and helping me improve my work. I also want to thank my friends Sonia, who made sure everything - but especially the tone - was flawless, and Lea, who nudged me in the right direction when I was stuck.
> 
> ❤

Raquel woke to the sound of waves washing against the shore. It took her a while to remember where she was, even as her eyes blinkingly adjusted to the soft morning glow shining through the window, intermittent by the palm trees outside. She smiled as the memories kept rushing back, flooding her brain with a sense of peace, of belonging.

She stirred to find Sergio already awake next to her, smilingly greeting her good morning.

“Good morning,” she said, her voice still groggy with sleep.

“How did you sleep?” he asked.

As an answer, she broke into a wide smile, and she moved closer to him, interweaving her fingers with his, bringing her head to lie in the crook of his neck.

“I slept just fine…” she murmured, her voice trailing off as she moved her head to kiss his chest and shoulder.

Sergio chuckled. “Looks like you’re feeling more than just fine now.”

“Are you complaining?” she prompted, an impish twinkling in her eyes.

“No, no, not at all,” he responded, his face wide with a sheepish grin.

“Good,” she declared, trailing her kisses further upwards before he turned his body to her and captured her lips with his, kissing her tenderly at first, then with more urgency as his left hand moved to cup her face.

“I’m so glad you came,” he breathed between kisses.

“It’s a good thing that I found those postcards… just the thought that this almost didn’t happen,” she sighed, breaking their connection, but staying close.

“I don’t want to imagine that,” he said, leaning his forehead against hers.

“Me neither,” she smiled, kissing him once more, softly and affectionately and he melted against her, drawing her close by the small of her back.

“Why did you, though?”

“Because what you said to me at the house in Toledo was true… it happened to both of us,” she answered. “When you left, there was this yearning inside me…” She snuggled closer against his chest. “I knew how I felt about you and… well, I thought about how you being in my life made everything better. And after you left, I craved your presence, stronger than anything else in my life, ever… only I didn’t know how to find you.”

“I felt the same way about you… but with every day that passed, I wondered if maybe I had pushed you too far after all… I thought I’d never see you again, Raquel.”

“But you’ve got me now, she whispered.

“I’ve got you now,” he echoed. “You came back to me.”

“Because _you_ came back to _me_ …” she said tenderly. “After you left, I tried to reconstruct the heist, piece by piece… and I noticed that no matter how much being with me fucked up your plan… you always came back.”

“How could I not?” he mused.

She smiled.

“After the hostages escaped….” he stopped, and something in his demeanor changed, but then he carried on, “after the hostages escaped, I wanted to stay away from you, I really did… and I almost…”

She recognized the look on his face immediately, his face suddenly clouded with dread.

“What’s wrong?”

He didn’t say anything for a while but turned his head to face her. She could virtually see the thoughts racing through his head behind his eyes, his expression laden with a heaviness that she felt in her core.

He opened his mouth as if to say something, but it took a while for the words to form. “Have you ever done something you regret?”

“Yes, of course,” she answered, “everyone has.” She grew increasingly concerned because of the graveness of his expression. “Sergio, please tell me what’s wrong.”

He stayed silent for a moment and she searched his eyes for an answer until, finally, he spoke again.

“I’ve done terrible things to you, Raquel.”

“We don’t have to talk about that,” she whispered soothingly against his shoulder, pressing a kiss to it. “I’m okay, we’re okay.” Her hands snaked closer around him, but he stiffened underneath her touch.

His brows furrowed deeper. “I have to…” he started, his voice thick with emotion. “I hate what I did to you. I can’t stop thinking about it…”

She let go of him and sat up, a deep frown forming on her forehead, mirroring his. “Sergio, I don’t care about the things that went wrong in the past.”

“I just–”

“Sergio, look at me,” she said sternly, and he reluctantly complied. “I don’t care that you lied to me. Not anymore. I did for a while, and then again after you had disappeared from my life. I was very angry… But I was able to let it go. I forgave you a long time ago.”

“You forgave me?” he asked tonelessly, and a flash of relief rushed through his eyes.

“I did,” Raquel replied and reached for his hand. This time, he didn’t resist. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about everything, Sergio. I mean _absolutely_ everything.” She paused. “I thought about every little thing… but through all of that, I remembered how you made me feel. I didn’t even know I was holding my breath, that I could feel this happy again until I met you. In so many ways, you _saved_ me.”

He looked at her, disbelieving.

“I _saved_ you?”

She nodded, pressing a kiss to the back of his hand, but instead of being soothed, he winced.

“I approached you with the intent to play you, to spy on you. You were not a person to me, not initially, but a pawn and I played with your reputation like it was nothing, like _you_ were nothing. I lied. And I feel like that doesn’t even begin to cover it. It wasn’t an accident. It was my plan all along. I did not save you, I _used_ you.”

The words just kept pouring out of him. Raquel did not reply immediately but considered him for a moment, her face deeply worried.

“You can’t tell me that’s not true,” he added, fear evident in his eyes as his gaze briefly flickered to meet hers.

Raquel squeezed his hand and straightened, but her expression was serious now. “Yes,” she replied, “but you loved me, too.”

It wasn’t a question; it was a statement. She said it with a definitiveness, that almost surprised him.

“I did. I _do_. But who would do that to someone they love? Maybe you were right, maybe I am disturbed.”

“Sergio,” she said softly, tilting her head slightly. “You are right. You did use me. I pondered over this a while back in Spain. You set up all these traps for me and made me question my mind. You hurt me. But you know what? It took me a while to realize this, but from your point of view, you didn’t have much of a choice except to keep lying to me, even as you were falling in love with me. Had you told me any earlier, I would have turned you in without a second thought. It was a situation without a solution, really… It’s weird to say this, but in a way, I am glad things went the way they did.”

He looked at her in astonishment.

“But, more importantly, you also gave me peace. I’ve never felt so _seen_ in my life. I felt like you really listened to me. To you, I _was_ a person. And I refuse to believe that all our interactions were all just a ruse for you to get close to me.”

“They weren’t,” Sergio replied quietly and shook his head.

“There were days when I didn’t feel like I could go on. But knowing that I’d see you at the end of the day, that’s what got me through the roughest parts.”

“That still doesn’t excuse it or make it right,” Sergio insisted, his body half-rising from the pillows in protest.

“No, it doesn’t. I am not perfect either, though.”

He gave her a puzzled look.

“Sergio,” she said half earnestly, half laughing, “you do realize I’m not perfect, right?”

“You’re not?”

It took her a second to realize that he was, indeed, serious, and she broke into a smile.

“I threatened to kill you and burn your corpse, for one.” She raised her eyebrows expectantly.

“Oh,” he said, averting his eyes and looking at his hands. “You would have been right to do so,” he murmured.

“I couldn’t have hurt you, though. I couldn’t even shoot you in the leg. Sometimes, I suppose, it’s one thing to think something or to plan it and another to actually go through with it.”

He turned his head sharply to look at her. “I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if I had done anything to seriously hurt you… I mean, any worse than I already had.”

Raquel nodded solemnly.

“I’m so very sorry for everything.”

“I know.”

“You do?”

“Sergio, _please_ , it’s written all over your face,” she laughed. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone look as sorry as you do right now.”

A relieved laugh escaped his lips.

“Are we good now?” she asked him, intertwining her fingers with his.

“Yes,” he answered, but then hesitated. “I just want to hold you right now.”

“Of course,” she breathed, laying down next to him, cuddling closer to his warm frame, bringing her head to rest on his chest, and she felt Sergio’s arms engulf her while he pressed kisses to her hair.

She closed her eyes again, happily listening to the heartbeat beneath her.

“Just so we’re clear, I chose to come here, and I am choosing to stay because you make me happy. _Very_ happy.”

“You’re staying?”

“Yes!” she replied, “… although I will eventually have to go back to Spain to sort things out so I can stay here with you indefinitely.”

Underneath her ear, his heartbeat picked up and she smiled against his chest.

She didn’t move for a long time, wanting to savor this moment and wishing it would never end.


End file.
